As I write this, we are shifting to a new phase in coping with the coronavirus pandemic. We are not in total shutdown. Businesses are opening up cautiously. People are interacting more, albeit six feet apart. Just as shutting down posed internal challenges, so will...
In the chaos of battle, military doctors use a system of triage to determine whom to treat. They divide the wounded into three categories: those who will survive without treatment, those who will likely die despite treatment, and those for whom treatment will make the...
In the past, I've talked about the need to identify a unitary goal in order to be more productive. A unitary goal is: ONE thing you are trying to do. You cannot be nimble if you are trying to achieve a twofer (accomplish two things at once) or if you are vague on your...
“Buffering” means doing a pleasurable activity to avoid feeling negative feelings about something else. A “buffering” activity offers instant gratification plus instant relief from unpleasantness. That can be an addictive combination, hence binge watching, binge...
A role model is someone who exemplifies your ideal in some area. Though you can learn concrete skills from role models, there is something more important you get from them: an integrated sense of the kind of person you want to be. That is what is irreplaceable. When...
Moral self-criticism doesn't need to be deeply painful, not if you interpret virtues as telling you how to be happy, not what kind of person you are. What??? I'm not saying moral self-criticism is going to be pleasant. A moral person is always going to feel some guilt...
Tactic: Formulate a Goal as a Headline What: Reconceive goals in terms of outcomes. When: When you have a goal and want to make sure you achieve it. How: Write the newspaper headline that you want to read after it's done. Why: The trick of thinking of a headline helps...
In helping some Thinking Labbers make accurate, precise value-judgments, I was reminded of a song I learned as a child. The lyrics as I remember: Nobody loves me. Everybody hates me. I'm going out and eat worms! The first one was easy. The second...
The "AND" list is a basic tactic for addressing resistance and temptation in the moment. You can use it when you aren't instantly motivated to do what you "should" be doing. This tactic helps you acknowledge your own mixed motivation so that you can act consciously...
Introspection Training Wheels Introspection is the process of identifying what you feel and why you feel it. A simple way to introspect is to look up your feelings in a table, then work backwards to identify what the underlying values are. This process is useful for...
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