In a call on "How to Get Results Now on Your Long-Term Objective,” I was asked whether I thought "should" should be eschewed. I don't. I think "should" should be reclaimed. However, for many people, this will involve automatizing a new meaning for the word "should."...
How to Make Yourself Do Something…or Not
People often ask me how to make themselves do something they think they're supposed to do. As a public service, I will answer that question. To make yourself do something, you need to shut out any thoughts that conflict with taking the action. That includes any...
How Does Being “Present” Relate to “Doing What Matters Most” or Being “In Focus”?
Be present. Do what matters most. Stay in focus. These are three life-affirming intentions. Are they different? Do you need to think about holding all three intentions in one instant? If not, which intention should you hold? Will it conflict with another intention?...
What It Means to Be “Present”
What does it mean to be "present" or "in the moment"? This concept comes up often in acting and communication classes, but it was never explained to my satisfaction. I could tell it was something good: those who were "present" seemed more authentic. They created an...
Celebration and Mourning
Paradoxically, celebration and mourning* are similar processes. They involve similar steps and achieve similar purposes. And they are similarly misunderstood and neglected, despite their critical importance to a joyful life. Neither celebration nor mourning concerns...
Plan to Be Surprised
I've had a love/hate relationship with planning, and I've finally figured out why. Although I love the clarity I get from planning, and I see that planning helps me in the long run, I had always been distressed when a project didn't go as planned. This is crazy. Most...
Start the Day with a Thought Download
I recommend "thinking on paper" * every day, on whatever issue seems important. But what do you do if you aren't sure what to think about? Start with a "thought download." ** A "thought download" is a page of thoughts--your thoughts. The page could be filled with...
Using a Proportional Response to Improve Quality
Improving the quality of your own performance, or that of an organization, can be a complex and long-term endeavor. In his book The Lean Startup, Eric Reis explains a doable method for making incremental adjustments that can dramatically improve performance in...
The Completions List
In order to live a happy life, you need to see yourself achieving your values on a daily, weekly, and annual basis. For this purpose, I recommend that you adopt some regular practices. The daily practice is the "3 good things" process. The annual process is an annual...
How Much Time Is a Problem Worth? 3 Minutes, 15 Minutes, More?
The #1 general-purpose problem-solving tactic I teach is "Thinking on Paper." If you are not familiar with it, get my freebie, "Thinking Directions Starter Kit." If you are confused, overloaded, uncertain, blank, conflicted, or stuck in any way, I recommend you turn...
Systematically Make Your Days Better by Creating a “Quality of Life” Benchmark
We're moving into the next phase of the coronavirus crisis. We're getting a glimmer of the long haul. To help you flourish through tough times, I recommend you take proactive action to ensure that you have sufficient pleasure in your life. You need positive...
Concentrating at Home
Thanks to Covid-19, many people are being asked to work at home. I thought I'd share a few thoughts on how to concentrate at home in the present circumstances. Some of the concentration challenges at home are obvious. There are clear distractions: Your family and your...
The Benefits of Frequent Finishing Points
I'd like to share an invaluable technique that improves both your productivity and your motivation: Deliberately plan to reach a finishing point in your work every half hour. A finishing point is different from a stopping point. For example, if you're juggling, and...