Your Goals Create the Garden You Live In
One of my friends has a beautiful flower garden behind her house. Every flower, plant, and object is there by design. The planning of a garden is a perfect analogy to setting your goals for the year. First, you don't make plans for a garden or set next year's goals...
Before Setting Goals for the New Year, Systematically Review Your Accomplishments
Every New Year's Day, I run a “Thinking Day” in the Thinking Lab, to provide coaching for members who are setting goals for the new year. To make sure you set goals from a position of strength, I recommend you systematically review all the past year's accomplishments...
How to Make Yourself Do Something…or Not
People often ask me how to make themselves do something they think they're supposed to do. As a public service, I will answer that question. To make yourself do something, you need to shut out any thoughts that conflict with taking the action. That includes any...
Case Study: A Value-Orientation and an Uh-Oh Log
Two days ago, I got my email inbox down to zero, for the first time in at least 18 months. Several times in the last few months, I had gotten down to 40 lagging emails, but never to zero. The story of my getting to zero is a case study in how a change in attitude then...
How Does Being “Present” Relate to “Doing What Matters Most” or Being “In Focus”?
Be present. Do what matters most. Stay in focus. These are three life-affirming intentions. Are they different? Do you need to think about holding all three intentions in one instant? If not, which intention should you hold? Will it conflict with another intention?...
What It Means to Be “Present”
What does it mean to be "present" or "in the moment"? This concept comes up often in acting and communication classes, but it was never explained to my satisfaction. I could tell it was something good: those who were "present" seemed more authentic. They created an...
Why You Should Pursue Only One Initiative
I found an old article of mine arguing that you should pursue only one initiative at a time. It was a little embarrassing to read because I am still learning this lesson the hard way. My latest conclusion is that you need to distinguish initiatives from other...
FAQ: How do you remember to notice something you can’t predict?
People often ask me how to remember to do something in the future. The answer usually is, make a plan. Then remember to check the plan. But some kinds of actions cannot be planned. For example, I started a humor notebook at the recommendation of comedian Judy Carter....
Celebration and Mourning
Paradoxically, celebration and mourning* are similar processes. They involve similar steps and achieve similar purposes. And they are similarly misunderstood and neglected, despite their critical importance to a joyful life. Neither celebration nor mourning concerns...
What is Missing from Your Plan for the Day?
Do you take 15 minutes to plan each and every day? I strongly recommend you do so. 15 minutes is enough time to let you review your calendar and consider your priorities. 15 minutes is enough time to get an overview so that you know what matters most today. 15 minutes...