Why You Might Want to Talk to Your Dog
A while back, I realized I needed something to help reinforce my intentions when I didn't seem to be following through on them. For example, I intended to work on a big project, but I found myself doing some little tasks, or taking a longer break than I really wanted...
How Naming the Emotion Can Tell You Why You’re Going Nowhere
It happens to all of us. You decide your priority, you sit down to work on the project, and for one reason or another you go nowhere. Maybe you're not doing the work — you're resisting it. Or maybe you're doing it, but slogging along without much to show for your...
The Value of Revisiting “Settled” Issues
Whether you grow or stagnate as you get older depends on how and when you rethink settled issues. An issue is settled when you evaluate it in the full context of your knowledge and conclude it is true or false. Some conclusions get settled for life. Philosophical...
Sometimes Concentrated Thinking Is Not the Answer
I like to quote Voltaire, who said, "No problem can withstand the assault of sustained thinking." And true to that idea and my calling, whenever I have a problem, I think about it. A lot. In depth. Until I have a solution. This is a virtue. It is my willingness...
Tip: Integrating Short-Term & Long-Term Priorities
At times you will face conflicts between short- and long-term priorities, such as: "I want to __[insert major goal here]____, but right now I need a job." "I want to start ___[insert new long-term project here]____, but right now I'm just keeping up with day-to-day...
To Learn Creative Skills, Develop “Self-Direction,” Not “Self-Discipline” or “Self-Control”
If you want to do creative work at a high level, you need to spend significant time developing your skills. There is no substitute for practice. Some people would say you need self-discipline to develop the skills. Others would say you need self-control to put in...
Two Ways to Step Up to Meet a Deadline
A deadline is the date a task needs to be finished. It is different from an estimated completion date in that there are real negative consequences for missing the target. For example, the deadline for filing taxes in the US was May 17 this year. The penalties are...
So You Don’t Feel Like Doing Anything
I've had every motivational problem ever. So when a participant in Launch 21 reported that she suddenly didn't feel like doing anything, I knew exactly what she was talking about. I call this being in a "funk." Suddenly, you live in a world that has nothing to offer...
The Value of Emotional Resilience
"Emotional resilience" is the ability to bounce back from emotional upheaval. You may have a moment of despair, but you recover quickly. Your buttons may be pushed, but you are able to be curious about your reaction and refocus on values. The key to emotional...
Resolve Conflict with the Golf Course Analogy
To resolve conflict, you need to understand the root cause. It's biological. We have two completely independent motivational systems. One system, traditionally called “motivation by love,” exists to motivate action toward values. A value in the psychological sense is...