Do you have the slightest desire to persuade another person to take an action that you believe is clearly in his or her best interest? If so, run out and buy a copy of Neil Rackham's 1988 book, SPIN Selling. Rackham presents the most rational approach to selling that...
There was a theme in the questions that members of the Thinking Lab asked me this week. They all involved some form of, "how do I motivate myself?" I've had an epiphany. This is a mistaken way to conceptualize the problem. Motivation is an effect, not a cause. When...
I had a call with a member of the Thinking Lab the other day. He was concerned that he was reverting to some old behavior. He had changed jobs, and as a result he was very busy ramping up his knowledge and activity in the new position. He said it had occurred to him...
You have probably heard the saying, "no plan survives contact with reality." There's a lot of truth in this — so what's the value of planning? Planning pays off before you take action, while you are taking action, and after you have taken action. The most obvious...
Some years ago I recommended the daily practice of identifying three good things that happen each day. This idea, which I got from Martin Seligman, helps you develop a more optimistic mindset. The original tip is also on the blog. In addition to making you more...
I am halfway through The Beck Diet Solution: Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person. Judith Beck's exercises, combined with MyFitnessPal, are helping me adhere to a lose-a-pound-a-week diet. I don't agree with everything in the book, but I give it a qualified...
I have just finished reading a short book on sales explaining the "magic words" to use to persuade people to do what you want. I have had a conniption fit several times while reading it. The purpose of the book is to teach the reader to become a "professional...
In the past, I've run sessions on "Rationally Connected Conversations" (RCC) an adaptation of Marshall Rosenberg's "Nonviolent Communication" (NVC). In one session I included Jeff Brown, a Certified Trainer in NVC, to discuss "How to say 'That's BS' in RCC." I...
It's a truism that you should break a complex or difficult project into small steps. The difficulty in applying that truism is in figuring out which of many possible steps to take next. You need to choose a good next step, quickly and effectively, without falling into...
In another article, I mentioned that whenever you give a reason for your conclusion, you should pause to make sure it passes the Laugh Test. Yes, the "Laugh Test." Sometimes your reason will turn out to be a patent rationalization, and you won't be able to repeat it...
For those of us who juggle several projects at work, a frequent question is, "which should I work on right now, in this chunk of time?" Sometimes the answer is obvious. Sometimes there's a crisis, and the best you can do is triage the work.1 And occasionally there's a...
The ideal relationship is open, honest, and equal. If you find that someone has lied to you or evaded, it puts the whole relationship in question. But I've noticed that some people jump to the conclusion that another person is dishonest without establishing it...
The other day I got a call at 9:00 a.m. about an event I'm planning for my Toastmasters club. I felt I needed to take it. Soon afterwards I noticed an email from a fellow volunteer in another organization. It concerned a problematic situation, and I was lured into a...
As a general rule, it is proper to trust your mind. Your conscious conclusions are based on all of your past choices, your past experiences, and the cumulative expertise you've built up over the years. However, when you make a decision based on limited information,...
Much of the advice for curing yourself of procrastination comes down to "just get started" or "just take a little step." Once you start on a task that you've been avoiding, you often find that the work develops its own momentum. If you can just get started, you can...
Last week I gave a terrific class on how to troubleshoot "Rationally Connected Conversations." I mentioned three mistakes to watch out for. Then yesterday in a conversation I made all three mistakes. Actually, I did catch mistake #1 at a certain point and remedy it....
At the start of a break during the workday, I have the idiosyncratic practice of reading one paragraph of Ayn Rand’s non-fiction. This is an example of a highly tailored tactic to help with a problem that many people have: breaks take over the work day. Let me explain...
In the Thinking Lab, I offer a self-study course called, "Evolving a Scheduling Infrastructure."1 The goal of the course is to help you get a basic system in place to keep you productive. The basic system consists of only three things: 1. A daily planning session (15...
Whenever I hear myself or someone else saying, "I have no choice," I challenge that idea. You always have a choice -- and owning your power of choice has huge benefits. When you think you have no choice, that just means you've ruled out the other options that you see....
A member of the Thinking Lab asked me for advice on how to decide whether to join a small startup or stay with his very successful, stable, lucrative job at a large company. Let's call him Max. Max had done a lot of thinking about his choice, but he still had some...
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